Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays

• I've been spending my winter break in Texas with family since Dec 18th. We're here 'til Jan 3rd.
• I'm stressed.
• I'm glad to be visiting. I have been having a great time with family and getting much needed rest.
• I'm stressed.
• J & I are still unemeployed.
• J's unemeployment caps out soon. I don't know what we will do when it does.
• I'm stressing.
• I have to pay 750$ to school for a failed class with money that I don't have.
• I'm stressing.
• I have so much that I want to do to the house, but no money for it.
• We were given a lot of money for the holidays. I'm going to buy the girls a new bunk bed with it and save the rest for later.
• My body hurts and I'm stressed.
• I'm going to make a booty call to my husband so I can sto stressing.

Dear friends

I'm going into business for myself and I am looking for my start-up customers. Would any of you be interested? This is the line of work I will be doing : http://www.pureromance.com/

See You In December

NaNoWriMo (full post)

The last post was just a snippet. This is the real deal. :D

So, first, HAPPY OCTOBER 31st for everyone who celebrates this day for whatever reason it may be, be it Pagan, Christian, or Secular.

Now that that's out of my system, I would like to mention a very important event coming up in just 24 hours. November is National Novel Writing Month, NaNoWriMo for short, NaNo for even shorter. This is the time when 23628756874568 (this is a real number, I promise you) want-to-be writers compete in writing a novel, a story consisting of a MINIMUM of 50,000 words, in 30 days or less. The entire month of November is full of broken pens and pencils, undiluted amounts of caffeine consumption, trashed papers, bloody laptop keys, etc. all in the name of SCIENCE, I mean, NOVEL-ING (is that even a word?) !!

Anyway, for the past three years I have attempted, and failed, at writing a coherent 50k. This year will probably be no different, though I will still be trying to reach that elusive 50k. I'm getting closer each year. I WILL DO IT THIS YEAR EVEN IF IT EATS MY SOUL!!!! So be warned: I may need dialogue and/or material for my novel, so be careful what you say or post around me. I no longer have 2 jobs, and even though I still have school, I now have a LOT of free time on my hands for writing.

I will be "INCOMUNICADO" for the ENTIRE month of November. Sort of. The first two weeks I have to work and I still have homework to do throughout. I also have Thanksgiving and religious gatherings. BUT other than that, DO NOT call, text, email, knock-on-my-door, etc me unless it is an emergency. If you are having a baby, or dying, or something, ONLY THEN will I care. Anything else and I'll growl and hiss at you from behind my lappy or do some hand-wavy-thing that means "go away" in some old tribal sign language.

SEE YOU IN DECEMBER WHEN NANO HAS EATEN MY SOUL!!!!!
Start taking bets now to see how much of my sanity I still have left by then.

National Novel Writing Month

NaNoWriMo in just 24 hours.
Insanity, here I come.

I already quit one job (not for NaNo, but still a good thing) and am only working the first 2 weeks in November at the other job. I will be OUT OF TOUCH for the ENTIRE MONTH OF NOVEMBER.

Have a wonderful and safe October 31st!

Life

two jobs. three kids. two majors.
part-time hostess. part-time sub. full-time mom. part-time homeschooler. full-time student.

life is so busy & so stressed right now, i sometimes wish i could just blow my brains out.

also, i'm learning archery.

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To Whom it May Concern

Why ask for my advice every time for your same-shit-different-day ordeal if you're never going to take it. I'm tired of listening to your constant problem if you're never going to do anything about it. Don't give me your bullshit excuses. You either follow through or you don't. I don't have time or energy to deal with your issues when I have plenty of my own.
/rant

*sigh* I've stopped answering my calls.

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Vacation Time

So far, my vacation has been going well. Last night alone was HILARIOUSLY spent with my, then seriously tipsy, MIL. I should also add that I was pretty tipsy myself. ;)

One thing I am certain about: I am SO GLAD that I live in Iowa, MANY miles away from my family and all of their drama. My mother made a couple of comments yesterday that really pissed me off. I had mentioned some old family friends that I hope to visit next year and she negatively interjected with "I don't even know what to say about those people." Seriously? They are like family. We've known them nigh about 25 years. They helped RAISE ME!. Ugh. And then I mention another friend of the family who is throwing a Quincenera for her daughter (the Hispanic coming-of-age celebration when your daughter turns 15) and that was another moment where I just did not want to be in the room. I don't care about this person's personal life. I don't care if it's a hot mess. My life isn't perfect, and I am not here to judge. I was invited to a party to celebrate an auspicious occasion. I don't give a flying fuck about how they are dealing with their drama. To top it off my brother is kind of being a douche and my sister has her own drama. It gets under my skin. My mother is a pastor. I love her, and I know she's not perfect, but jeez, should a pastor talk about people like that? Should a pastor judge others in that way? Seriously? She gets on her preachy almighty horse trying to bring others to the Truth, but she turns around and acts like that? Ugh. Just, ugh.

Other than that, I am REALLY enjoying my stay. I went crazy spending money and am now negative a hundred dollars in my bank account in just 4 days. I don't know where my head went. I should have just spent it all on crack cocaine. At least then I'd have a reason as to why I couldn't remember. I've also spent a lot of much needed, um, "quality" time with J. *wink-wink* Now all I have to do is write my paper for my class that is due on Saturday. I've been looking for excuses *not* to do it. But at least I am passing. I've stayed a good week ahead in my work so far, but it's only week 2 out of 5.

It's My Birthday!

I was bombarded today with wonderful Facebook messages, text messages, and phone calls from friends and family wishing me a great 24th birthday. I felt very blessed to have so many wonderful people in my life. :)

I did absolutely nothing today. I had planned to do some chores, but instead I dolled myself up, dropped the dog off at Brenna's (who is taking care of her while we are away), did some shopping for our trip at Walmart, and went to have our meal at Village Inn. (FREE PIE WEDNESDAY!!!) It seems pretty uneventful, but I'm tired and happy, and FULL.

I'm so ready to go. I've already packed all of the girls' things and have set out their outfits for Friday. After I stop writing in this I'm going to start packing my things. The only thing I need to worry about is that all the dishes are cleaned, the cats are dropped off, the lawn is mowed, I run a couple of more errands.....ugh! I hate planning for vacations!! Why can't we all be Hogwarts alumni, yell PACK! and have everything set and ready to go with just a wave of the wand? Oh well, I make do.

Is it Friday yet?

Storm of the Century

Holy Cow. I am not kidding.

At around 230pm today, I received a text message from the weather channel for a tornado watch for my town. I had just checked the mail and needed to run errands. My husband wanted me to stay home, I wanted to drive the half hour to Walmart to go buy much needed diapers for Rose and some other necessities, like toilet paper. I *could* have gone to the grocery store down the street, but my stubborn ass just HAD to go to Walmart.

The sparkling blue sky was speckled with white and puffy clouds. I thought to myself that the tornado watch was going to pass within the hour or so that I'd be at the store. I was wrong. Terribly wrong. When we, that is to say Lily and I, were headed back home, the sky suddenly went from blue with puffy clouds to dish-water grey with giant, ominous clouds. Lightning struck. The wind was blowing well up in the 20s and even 30mph mark. But I was fine. The rain hadn't started to fall where I was. I could *see* this terrible storm, but I wasn't actually in it, until I crossed the invisible boundary line. What seemed like out of nowhere, the winds picked up, the rain poured down in torrents. The darkness had settled in, making 530 on a summer evening look like night. The windshield wipers were pumping as fast as they could, but not fast enough for me to see anything. I had to slow the car down to a crawl and put on my hazards. I still had a good 15 minutes to get into my town. As soon as I got off the ramp into town, the hailstones began to fall. Giant, golf-balls made of ice pelted me as I drove as carefully as possible home. Lily of course had to make commentary the entire way, but I don't remember much of it. I was too busy swearing at the ridiculous drivers who were going well over 40mph, passing me in this god-awful storm.

We obviously made it home okay. The car didn't suffer any hail damage, and when we made it home, I stowed it away in the garage. I was super happy that I had gotten a bug in my butt this morning to tidy up the garage. I didn't have to worry about the car. Anyway, I now leave you with a couple of pictures and videos. :)

***if you are viewing this in LJ, you will not have the pictures and videos posted. the original post is found at http://vonnieness.blogspot.com/***

I:

Memoir: In Where I Talk About Child Abuse, Depression, and Recovery

Part One: In which we learn about my parents and other relevant stuff.



My parents met some time in the 1980s when mullets were cool and break-dancing was the thing. When exactly they met, I don't really know, nor did I ever really care enough to find out. My mom, at that time, was a divorced mother of two. What i was told was that she had left her previous husband, the father of my sister, Solymar, and my brother, Nestor, because he had become abusive and was having an affair. I haven't done any actual fact-checking on this, so you don't have to take my word for it. My father was also divorced and a father to my brother, David. He had been a friend of my siblings' father and had met my mother through that relationship. Now, in her marriage, my mother had conceived another child. Unfortunately, she miscarried and was unable to carry a pregnancy to term. The doctors had told her that, no matter how hard she tried, she would not be able to have any more children. She was a bit disappointed at first, but accepted her fate. She was happy with the two children she already had and, after her divorce, wasn't really planning on having any more. So when my parents were well into their relationship and I showed up, it was a bit more than just a surprise.

I was born on June 2, 1986 in Caguas, Puerto Rico, two and a half months before my actual due date. Even though I had broken my mother's water with my foot and had to be delivered by emergency c-section, I was healthy. Tiny, but healthy. To be honest, I probably would have been tiny regardless. Currently at 5 feet tall, I'm no Amazon in any way. Solymar was ecstatic to have a new baby sister, my brothers, not so much. Nestor had really wanted a baby brother and had asked my mother if she could exchange me for one at the hospital. david was only three at the time and had more toddler-important things he cared more about. Regardless of how anyone in the family felt, everyone called me a miracle baby. Aunts and uncles debated with my mother on what she should name me. They had wanted Milagro, my mother's middle name, which means "miracle" in Spanish. In the wnd, my mother named me Yvonne Marie, after herself (Ivonne) and her mother (Maria.)

My parents never married, and I'm glad they never did. Not long after my birth, my mother realized that she and my father were incompatible. Though he had asked for her hand in marriage, she had refused. My dad was, is, very mellow. He's the lenient, laid-back type who likes to have fun. My mom, on the other hand, was, is, very rule-oriented, meticulous, stubborn. She had a household to run and she liked it done a certain way. She was tired of being taken advantage of, and though I'm sure my father never really felt he did, my mother had felt she had. It wasn't that they didn't care about each other, it was just that they kept butting heads so much. She didn't see my father as a responsible adult (my father later admitted that she was right.) Enough was enough. By the time I was about a year old, my mother kicked my father out.He came home one day to find all of his things out on the sidewalk.

...more later...

Summer

• I am doing good in school. So far only pre-reqs. Got a 97 in my EXP 105 and currently have an 82 in PSY 202. I start my first real class, ENG 121, on June 1.
• Thursday, J got laid off and I passed my driving exam. I am now licensed to drive.
• J is enjoying his "time off", so we are going to visit family in TX soon.
• My 24th birthday is Wednesday June 2. Five words: Free Pie Wednesdays, Village Inn
• I have an interview tomorrow at Gurney's Restaurant at 7pm.
• I'm getting teeth work done on Friday.
• I feel detached.

Menu Plan Monday

This is my first attempt at a menu plan. Granted, I'm not the one who actually cooks dinner in this house, but I think it's a good practice anyhow. It will help my husband (who is the one who does the cooking) know what we want during the week instead of all of us standing in front of the pantry wondering what we should have.

Monday: fish chowder (a concoction my husband came up with made of cream of celery, rice, spinach, and tilapia)

Tuesday: steak and potatoes

Wednesday: left over chowder

Thursday: Asian-style noodle soup (another concoction of my husband's)

Friday: chicken nuggets and fries

Saturday: left over soup

Sunday: left over buffet

Memoir

Memoirs: In where I share about Sexual Abuse, Depression, More Abuse and Recovery

That's the title, at least. I'm going to try and and write a memoir again. I tried back in my senior year of high school, but it was difficult trying to find my voice. I think I have it now. I think it will be a just a bit easier this time 'round.

As a disclaimer, I went through some unfortunate shit (if you haven't figured it out by the title). So when the writing starts to get a little rough, just drive through.

Cheers.

Today is "hug a Hispanic"

Today is "hug a Hispanic" day. So c'mon & gimme some love! i'll totally hug myself.

GLEE

Could you do me a favor and be awesome by voting for my Glee audition video?: http://www.myspace.com/gleeauditions?link=381318096

please love me and gimme a gold star. *batting eyelashes with big Anime eyes*

I am worried.

Last week I took Lily to the doctor thinking she had an urinary tract infection or a bladder infection. For the past couple of months she has been having problems wetting herself no matter how many times she went to the toilet. However, when they tested her urine everything came back negative for an infection. What didn't turn out so well was the fact that she had a lot of blood in her urine. Most women who are about to start their menstrual cycle don't come out with this amount of blood in the urine. The doctor believes it may be urinary reflux.

What is apparently not so rare with children her age is when the kidneys send urine to the bladder and the bladder regurgitates a bit of it back into the kidneys. The doctor says that if that is the case, it can easily be fixed with a bit of noninvasive surgery.

Grade

Life in Bullet Points

• School is going good. I like the fact that I am only taking one class at a time. The due dates are the same every week. All discussions are due on Thursday, all quizzes are on Sunday, and you have to respond to everything by Monday.
• Week 3 started today in school. I currently have a 95% in my class.
• My cycle started on Sunday. I feel like I am dying.
• My everything hurts, I'm bleeding so much it's ridiculous, I really hate being female. I already have 3 kids; someone please remove my girl parts.
• Having behavior problems with Lily, but it's getting better.
• Trying to potty-train Iris.
• Rose loves me best. I think it's just because my boobs have milk for her.
• I have the curriculum for next year (home-schooling) set. Lily and Iris will be in 1st grade and preK at ages 4 and 2.
• My kids are full of awesome.
• J has been having anxiety attacks and sleep deprivation. He is now on Lexapro and Lunesta. He is feeling MUCH better.
• I somehow lost 10 lbs without noticing. Weird, considering I eat everything in sight.
• I'm still overweight and need to lose somewhere between 10 to 20lbs to be at a healthy level.
• I haven't been able to sleep for a long while.
• I don't know what I'm doing 90% of the time. I've BSed my homework in class, don't know where I put anything, and have been trying to organize my house unsuccessfully.
• I do everything with magic. That's the only way I can explain why my head hasn't exploded yet.
• My days start at 8am and end at 2am.
• The weather has been beautiful recently, so we've been spending a lot of time out of doors. Hopefully all the walking and days at the park will help me lose those 20lbs.
• I currently feel like death and wish I could punch someone.
• Life is BUSY, HECTIC, CRAZY right now, and I love it. I love that I'm not just sitting idly watching the days go by.
• I've planned a field trip to the city dump tomorrow.
• I'm still working on getting my driver's license. I still need serious work on my parallel parking but at least I've stopped having serious panic attacks on the highway.

Learnings.

So, this month I applied to college. :)
This week is Spring Break so I won't actually be starting my classes until Tuesday the 23rd.
I am super excited.
I'm doing an online accelerated program for a BA in History. I also get a grant provided from the university because I have military benefits. Here are bullet points on why I love this idea:

it is ALL online.
I can do it in my free time (after the girls are in bed for the night) and not worry about transportation.
I only take ONE class at a time.
Each course is only 5 weeks long.
I can still get my degree in 4 years.
tuition has been discounted from $354/credit hr to $254/credit hr.
I got my $55 applicatione fee waived.
I also had my $900 technical fees waived.
MY BOOKS ARE FREE!

I start of with the following two classes:

EXP 105 Personal Dimensions of Education

This course is designed to help adult learners beginning their university studies to achieve academic success. Students will explore learning theories, communication strategies, and personal management skills. Adult learners will develop strategies for achieving success in school and work. Students will also be introduced to the University's institutional outcomes and learning resources.

PSY 202 Adult Development & Life Assessment

This course presents adult development theory and links theoretical concepts of life and learning through a process of psychometric assessment and reflection. Both classical and contemporary adult development theories are examined. These theories then provide the paradigm for self-analysis and life learning, including a plan for personal, professional and academic learning.

Hooray for easy A's first thing. :D

Getting to Know You

1. If you're on my friends list, I want to know 36 things about you. I don't care if we never talk, or if we already know everything about each other. Short & sweet or long and detailed, all is good.

2. Comment here with your answers & repost the questionnaire on your own journal.

01) Are you currently in a serious relationship?
02) What was your dream growing up?
03) What talent do you wish you had?
04) If I bought you a drink what would it be?
05) Favorite vegetable?
06) What was the last book you read?
07) What zodiac sign are you?
08) Any Tattoos and/or Piercings? Explain where.
09) Worst Habit?
10) If you saw me walking down the street would you offer me a ride?
11) What is your favorite sport?
12) Do you have a Pessimistic or Optimistic attitude?
13) What would you do if you were stuck in an elevator with me?
14) Worst thing to ever happen to you?
15) Tell me one weird fact about you.
16) Do you have any pets?
17) What if I showed up at your house unexpectedly?
18) What was your first impression of me?
19) Do you think clowns are cute or scary?
20) If you could change one thing about how you look, what would it be?
21) Would you be my crime partner or my conscience?
22) What color eyes do you have?
23) Ever been arrested?
24) Bottle or can soda?
25) If you won $10,000 today, what would you do with it?
26) What's your favorite place to hang out at?
27) Do you believe in ghosts?
28) Favorite thing to do in your spare time?
29) Do you swear a lot?
30) Biggest pet peeve?
31) In one word, how would you describe yourself?
32) Do you believe/appreciate romance?
33) Favourite and least favourite food?
34) Do you believe in God?
35) Will you repost this so I can fill it out and do the same for you?

Back to School

I AM GOING BACK TO SCHOOL! GO ME!
I start classes at Ashford University for my History major March 16.

formspring.me

Ask me anything http://formspring.me/lunaskye

Jumping on the Bandwagon

In my defense, I must admit, it is a pretty wagon.

Anyway, saw a few of my online and RL friends doing this, so I'm going to do it, too. I felt left out. ;)

Ask me anything at: http://www.formspring.me/lunaskye

Ask a question, any question, and I'll answer it. As long as it's appropriate.

Welcome to the 28 Day Organizing Challenge!

Welcome to the 28 Day Organizing Challenge!

Posted using ShareThis

So I've decided to do this challenge. Here's the video of my ungodly mess in my "craft" room. Wish me luck! (for those viewing this post in LJ, to view video, click THIS link)

First Real Post of the Year

Today is my 5 year wedding anniversary. How will it be spent? Probably sleeping. Man, we are some party animals.

J and I have known each other since I was 14 years old. We didnt' like each other when we first met, and didn't become friends until about a year and a half after we had first met. We started dating about another six months after that on May 21, 2002. We were married a month after I moved in with him when he was still stationed at Offutt AFB, NE. Five years later...well, we're here.

I love my husband dearly, though sometimes I feel he doesn't give me enough credit for what I do with the girls, he's always been a good provider. And though a lot of times, we argue, we haven't reverted to what we were in the beginning of our marriage. We have gone through so much together over the years, and even though we get on one another's nerves 90% of the time, he's always helped me when I needed it the most.

Lately I've felt like punching him in the face, but it's because I'm stressed and frustrated. I've started my portfolio for Lily in homeschooling. I won't really need it for another year, but when she is finally compulsory age, I will be able to show where we are educationally and developmentally. It takes a lot of patience and focus to teach a child, and it's a lot harder to separate 'school' from 'home' when both are done in the same place by the same people. J and I have been butting heads on what is required, what should be done, and how it should be done. I'm tired and frustrated, and we've both been coming off as assholes.

I'm exhausted. The only time I have for myself is when they children are asleep. Homeschooling takes a good couple of hours every day. Lily loses focus frequently and Iris would rather go play than practice tracing. Add a screaming infant who is an attention whore, and you have my day. I must be crazy to be doing this, but I know what works best for my children and the public school system doesn't provide what they need. They are advanced. Lily, who just turned 4 last month, is at a Kindergarten level in some areas and 1st grade in others, while Iris, who is 2, is already at a Pre-K/Kinder level herself. It takes all I have to keep them occupied.

I've been pretty bummed since I left Texas. I miss my family. I miss being around people my age on a semi-regular basis. I've just been spending the last few hours of my "day" watching episodes of Farscape on Netflix instant view. I had started a diet this year, since I am 20 pounds overweight, but have stopped because I just don't care enough to keep it up. I'm just so tired of life right now; I want to give up.

V is for Vacation

I am currently in a hotel in Del City, Oklahoma on my way back to Mo. Valley. For the last two weeks we've been in Killeen, TX visiting family. I had a good time. I'm tired and keep falling asleep in the car. We got here about 3 hours ahead of schedule at 4.30pm. We've been sitting here watching a Dirty Jobs marathon on the Discovery Channel.

I didn't do 95% of what I wanted to do back home, but I still had a great time. Saw a couple of friends, though not everyone I wanted to, and spent a lot of time with family. I really missed everyone and enjoyed the wonderful weather. ;) It has been negative degree weather in Nebraska/Iowa, while the weather in Texas, though raining a lot of times, was in the 50s/60s. We actually had to buy clothes while there because all I had brought were sweats. (it had been in the 30s the week BEFORE we arrived)

I did a bunch of stuff; saw Sherlock Holmes and New Moon, saw a handful of friends, Christmas, Lily's birthday, New Year's Eve...and having a vacation from both my husband and children on occasion. My family thought it was weird we were sleeping in different houses. I love him to death, but we can only stand each other in small doses. ;)

I just realized this is the first entry for the new year. We should be back at our house tomorrow. I am so ready for my own damn bed. I only have one goal this year and it's to lose 20 pounds by April. I am 20 lbs overweight, which I haven't been in since I was 14. I weigh right now what I weighed when I was IN LABOR with Lily.

Hope everyone has a very happy new year.