Thursday, July 31, 2008

So new people have begun reading this blog and I feel it is time to let everyone new know some stuff about myself. (Or remind anybody who may have forgotten) :D

My name is Yvonne Ortiz Ames. I usually go by Vonnie (from my name), but am also known as Cyndi (from my obsession admiration) or Luna (from my religious path). Only a select few call me the last two. I am 22 yrs old, born 2 Jun 1986 and am Hispanic by birth. I was born in Puerto Rico but was raised in the states and am bilingual (English is my SECOND language, Spanish is my FIRST). I married my high school sweetheart 3 yrs ago (25 Jan 2005) and have two wonderful daughters named Lily [26 Dec 2005] & Iris [26 Oct 2007]. I'm naming my daughters after flowers. The general consensus is I'm a bit weird.

My mother is incredibly religious. She is a nondenominational Christian pastor and very devout. She has had a history of mental illness that I, unfortunately, have also. My step-father was a douche. He was controlling and abusive and molested me from the ages of 9 to 12 and I still hold a bit of anger toward that. He committed suicide when I was 13. I'm okay now, and know it was not my fault, but it has caused many problems with intimacy and trust. My biological father was non-existent in my childhood and only now am I getting to know him.

My husband and I are both total idiots. I love him to pieces and he's actually very bright, but he's done some serious harm in the past. I have done the same, if not more. We almost lost a lot of our lives because we didn't know how to communicate and instead would throw punches. After a lot of drama and dilemma, we came to realize that family is important no matter what and that our children deserve the best. He is currently one of the most awesome men I know (Jaz, your husband is another) and he spoils my daughters and I rotten. I've been spoiled so much that I don't even remember what parenting was like when I was separated. He's a nerd and is into comics, computers and video games. I am not and am into theology, Harry Potter, and blogging. We are the epitome of opposites attract and have absolutely nothing in common. We love each other a lot, but don't necessarily get along or like each other much. ;)

I'm a very devout Pagan, Wiccan to be exact. I practice regularly and am finding different ways to incorporate my beliefs in my daily life. My husband is atheist and doesn't really care what I believe as long as it makes me happy. We are not raising our children in any specific religious setting. We have several religious texts in the house. They will choose when they are old enough. For now I take them to my mother's church so they can go see their Abuela and let them tag along to any coven meets if they want to come with Mommy.

I'm jack of all trades and master of none, so I'm pretty useless. I can't cook to save my life. I hate to do chores and rarely keep up with the cleaning. And I quit college because I hate being tied down. I'm surprised I've stayed married. I'm someone who has to constantly keep moving. So the fact that I live in a small town in the middle of nowhere with no way to go anywhere because I have panic attacks behind the wheel and rely on my husband for transportation makes me a little mental.

I have a very musical background. I've been singing since the age of two, my grandmother was a vocalist, my uncle is a musician, and while growing up, as a family we would get together a couple of times a month and sing songs from my culture. I tried to learn piano but my attention span is next to nothing so I only know a little bit. And my guitar skills are worse. (Though I can play a really kick-ass tambourine) I can read sheet music, but that's about it. I'm a vocalist more than anything, and I love to sing to my girls. They love to be sung to and at night, when they are tired and upset, it is the only thing that will calm them. I had the opportunity to really make something out of myself through music when I was a bit younger, but I turned it down and her I am instead.

My health is not so great. As a teen I had an eating disorder (E.D. - non-specified), did drugs (marijuana & acid), drank, and smoked. After meeting J and feeling comfortable in my body, I was able to overcome my body image issues. After high school I got away from the bad crowd and no longer did drugs. After a bad experience with Everclear at a Frat party I lost my taste for alcohol. And after having to have my gallbladder removed because I was sick for half a year I decided to quit smoking. I had tried multiple times (I did not smoke during my pregnancies) but this time I really stuck with it. Because I did not take care of myself for so many years it has come to royally bite me in the ass. I have a bad hip, a bad back, grey hair, and get sick very easily. My joints hurt when it's too humid, sunlight gives me a headache and too much heat makes me dizzy. I'm currently working to get my health back.

I don't have much going on in my life right now. This is about as up to date as it will get. I'm hoping to audition for an Irish Punk band tomorrow and we'll see how that goes. And now I'm off. I need to do dishes.

If you would like to know more about me or have any questions or anything, feel free to ask; my life is an open book. I have no secrets and I regret nothing. :)

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

So I promised an entry about my surgery...
...and I totally forgot. So her it goes, from the beginning.

Around August of last year, I started getting sick. I thought it was just some morning sickness due to the pregnancy, so I ignored it. I couldn't eat anything too greasy, or anything that would make me bloat, so when J had made some sweet potatoes with greens and pork and beans, I spent most of that night vomiting and then some. Everything was coming out of both ends. But since I was pregnant at the time, I didn't think twice about it.

Around December/Christmas, it happened again. This time, I was very scared. I had thrown up so much that I had started vomiting blood. I felt terrible, and I felt even worse because I was in the bathroom so much I couldn't nurse Iris, so I had my brother-in-law give her a bottle. I called the Emergency Room and spoke to the on call doctor. He said not to worry, I was too young for an ulcer and it was probably that I ate something my body didn't like.

Two months later, and I'm still sick. J thinks it's my diet. So I change it and nothing helps. I go to the doctor and he says I have hemorrhoids, so I get meds and take care of that. I'm still miserable, but J thinks I'm being a drama queen and a hypochondriac and that it's still just my diet. He thinks I'm making myself throw up. I just wanted to punch him.

Fast forward to June, four months later. I am sick on my birthday vomiting for hours. Later in the week, I am sick again and vomit all night. J thinks it's because we are on vacation and I've been eating junk. I am on the phone with my friend Meg and she mentions my gallbladder. Her brother is a vet and her mother is a nurse. I tell myself to go see a doctor as soon as we get back.

When we get home from vacation it gets worse. I am vomiting every day. I cannot eat. I changed my diet to a liquid diet just so I could survive the days. I am miserable, in pain, I have vomiting and diarrhea so bad that I end up bleeding and it feels like a I have a ping-pong ball wedge underneath my right ribcage. Meg mentions my gallbladder again. I look it up and mention it to J. He thinks I'm being over dramatic and that I'm self-diagnosing. So I go to the doctor and he prescribes me some pain medicine and some anti-nausea medicine as well. I stay with the liquid diet because I am nursing and I cannot take phenegran when breastfeeding.

Of course, as you know, I end up needing surgery and while in surgery they find a gallstone the thickness of my pinky lodged in one of the gallbladder's ducts. J looked at the picture in surprise and said "It looks like trying to shove a tennis ball through a garden hose."You'll see what he meant if you go to the previous post and check out the picture.

And, as you also know, the surgery went fantastically, and I feel great. My surgeon was awesome, my doctor is awesome, and my nurse (who oddly enough is my doctor's wife) was beyond awesome. I hated being in that hospital. I hate hospitals. But I needed to get better. I missed my girls. I hadn't realized just how much of my entertainment comes from them until I was stuck in the hospital and didn't want to be there.

I'm healed completely. It was just a couple of incisions that they used to stick the camera in and use the tools to cut out my gallbladder, sew up my insides, and pull the gallbladder through a tube. Its amazing what doctors can do.

Friday, July 11, 2008

Had gallbladder surgery two weeks ago. This is a picture of my gallstone.

Wednesday, July 02, 2008

I'm going to stop going to the doctor. Even for follow-ups. Every time I go to the hospital, they find something new wrong with me. I went for my first follow-up after the surgery and they found I have an UTI. So, yay...more pills. :\

Also I find it amusing when both my cat and my 8-mth-old find my skirt very entertaining.