Friday, July 20, 2001


Sorry, I just felt aggitated and felt like "screaming".

Thursday, July 19, 2001

I went to my old youth class up in FWWM today! I had so much fun and everyone was glad to see me again. We made little autograph book and stuff in class. Karl told me to come back to church NOW! and in his words! So I guess I have missed them a lot. Brandy was practically bouncing off the cieling when she saw me and I gave her a present of a Sailor Moon poster for her birthday. I feel so happy!

Monday, July 16, 2001

I went to the movies today and saw Legally Blonde. I so loved that movie! It's so funny! I can't wait for college. I'm thinking of going to Harvard, but not law. I'm taking meteorology. Tom, Cris and I went to see it. I liked it. But you know guys these days and chick flicks. Well, later!!! :)

Thursday, July 12, 2001

I'm talking to my sister and Nessa online. My sister's being a trait. But anyways, I get to go to the pool today with Nathalia. I'm hoping to talk to Chris about what next today, too. This month has been pretty hectic and today I finally get a break. My day off, and i"ve been waiting for a while. My calendar is a mess...

I got Sunday Church services at 10.30 am on July 1, 8, and 15. I have Chruch Choir Rehersal on Mondays the 2, 9, and 16. Then I had a campaƱa for three days for the 6, 7, and 8. The I have Tuesday service for 3, 10, and 17, and then a meeting for choir on the 11 with a FWWM youth class on the 18. I'm going to the pool with Nessa today and next week, 19, I have to start packing and spend my day with Jenny M. Then of course I have my friday services at 7:30 Pm. Then Saturday, 21, i leave at 6 in the morning for PR and I don't come home until the 31!!! So, i need this day off...I just hope it doesn't turn out to be a bad one.... :(

Wednesday, July 11, 2001

Chris called me today around 3:30 pm. He got the e-mail and he sounded really upset. I was bawling on that phone and crying my eyes out. I could hear his hurt and dissappiontment in his voice...he's gonna dump me, I know it... :( Well, I'm going to go to bed, I just got home from church. Cris apologized, I didn't even care or even listen. I never wanted it to end this way! AH! I'm so upset!

Tuesday, July 10, 2001

The dreaded thing happen! The one thing I thought I wouldn't do again! The one thing I promised Chris I wouldn't do! And I did it! I can't believe it!! I'm so upset with myself! I have to tell him right away! This is the letter that I've e-mailed him today...

The e-mail is below...

Subject :
please read the whole thing!! --vonnie

Date :
Mon, 9 Jul 2001 01:51:14 EDT


From the get go, I just want to say that I am tremendously sorry, I had no
idea why this happened and that I love you the same as I always have. Now
remember on Saturday how I was curious to know what would happen if you found
out if you had made out w/ another guy? Well, I jynx myself.

I'm so sorry. It happened today (Sunday) at the movies with Cris Brown. Now
don't be going to church and killing him. OK? I blame myself, even though he
was the one who grabbed my face and kissed me, I still kissed back. I'm
sorry. I never wanted to do something so stupid like that!

I know you probably hate me right now...and I can't belive I even did that. I
don't know why, and I don't even know how. I'm being honest with you becuase
I don't want you to be finding this out by someone else, and I know I'm
seriously risking a shit load, just everything...but I'm sorry. I have to be
honest with you. I can never lie or keep something from you. And I never
will. You are my everything, and I just ruined it. Everything that I ever
had, I just lost for doing the most stupidest and most retarded thing I have
ever done. I let my hormones get the best of me. And it's my fault...

Don't be mad at Cris. Be mostly mad at me, b/c I don't want anything more
worse to happen. I'm in tears right now, so I am REALLY SORRY. I'm
emotionally sorry, and as a person in general...I'm a very sorry person for
doing this. I never thought I would do something like this!!

If your mad at me, like beyond pissed off, I understand. If you're going to
dump me, I seriously understand. And I just want to let you know that even
though I know your going to make my life a living hell...more than it already
is...I'll still love you and I'll still regret kissing Cris...please forgive
me...eventually. I know it will take time...

I'm sorry. Call me as soon as you get this if you want or e-mail me or
I'm sorry...

Much Love Always and Forever,

I'm still in shock from it all!!! Argh! :( I don't know what to think anymore!

Sunday, July 08, 2001

I finally got to talk to Chris after this big week of total silence and stress! I've been so busy. He tells me Christen and Grant are having problems b/c Grant was making out with other girls...I wonder what would happen if that happened with me and Chris?? I asked him today and he said he would disown me...I so hope I can keep my word. I promised him I'd never do it... But I have to go, b/c I have church tomorrow morning...

Thursday, July 05, 2001

ID4 2k1

I went to the carnival, and I just got home. My feet are killing me. I was there from 7:30 up until it closed which was at midnight. I waited for Nessa and Amber to go, but I guess they couldn't make it.

Well, the fireworks were pretty cool. I met up with some old buddies from HHHS. And I met Cris Brown's friends and stuff and I got phone numbers and then some...but Cris Brown and I made our own little fireworks when we were watching them...

Well, like I said, my feet hurt, I'm not exactly tired but I'm going to go lie down and meditate now...