Thursday, January 26, 2006

J has been sending 50 dollars a week now. I'm very thankful, grateful that he's doing so. It helps out more than he knows.

We sent each other anniversary gifts. It was nice. So at least we celebrated it in some weird sort of way. We also talk when we can. It's awkward and things still hurt, but at least we talk. I want Lily to have parents that can communicate and be friends. I don't want her to have my parents.

I started my Mary Kay business. I don't know how that's going to go as I don't know many people who use the products. They are awesome products, if you ask me, but it will still be some time to know whether or not this is for me. I have everything I need, I just need customers.

I'm going back to school come June. I'll be starting cosmetology then, and by September, I'll be taking the basic classes necessary to continue my education before enrolling into the university. I've already applied for financial aid and all things needed, so fingers crossed 'til then. I just need to do something with my life if it's going to go anywhere.

I've fallen into the mother routine rather well. I can tell when my daughter is hungry, wet, soiled, or when she wants her pacifier. She's very calm, and not very needy, which alrms me in many ways, but all in all, it's a great experience to be enduring. I love my child more than words could ever express. I tell her so everyday.

I'm actually surprised that I am not suffering from post partum depression. It makes me feel stronger just knowing that.
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